Do Hard Things

Have you ever heard “Victory produces joy and joy produces confidence”?

I recently went on an adventure where I saw this principle first hand.

Excited about the unknown ahead, we took our bikes off of the bike rack and headed them to the office that was located at the edge of the 10,000-foot elevation mountain. Here we were to get our safety gear before we rode ourselves and our mountain bikes up the gondola so as to reach the top bike trail that would lead us down the mountain. Now, heights were once a big fear of mine but I have been in the habit of going toe to toe with my fears lately. So, I WAS NOT going to let a little 10,000-foot down elevation stop me from this adventure.

Geared up with helmets and pads, we began our 10-minute ride. Sitting beside me was my husband and his son who is 9. He was filled with excitement and could barely contain himself as we rode up. As we got off the lift, we chose a bike path and began our ride down. It started out a little shaky, and somewhat slow, so we got our bearings under us and then began to roll.

J was the lead, John was in the middle, and I was at the back.  As our confidence increased, our daringness also increased, John’s increased a little faster than his skills had developed, and out of my site, around a bend, I hear John yell and then cry.  He had taken a corner faster than his skills could handle, and instead of going around, he went up-took some air-then crashed into a pile of trees. When J and I got to him, he was on the ground crying.

I couldn’t blame him, not only was the bike landing on him painful but taking some air probably scared the geebers out of him. We got him up, cleaned him up, and made sure he was not seriously injured…okay maybe not in that order, but you know what I mean. Once the shock was over and the giggles came out, we knew we were ready to hit the trail again.

Well, we thought we were. John, on the other hand, did have an injury that we hadn’t seen.

It was on the inside.

In his mind.

That fall not only took his breath for a second, but it also took his confidence. He was now fear-filled in every thought.  After three feet of biking then, he was down again. This happened over and over and over for about 15 minutes.  Each time he would get upset, get discouraged, and lose more steam. J and I spoke kindly to him each time, encouraging him to get up, get back on and try again, but these words were just not enough. Finally, I spoke in a stern voice, “John”, I said, “That’s enough. It’s okay to do hard things!”

“No, it’s not!” he snapped back.

Our society has taught us that ” If it’s hard, you shouldn’t do it.”

But my bible says…

“Whatever your hand finds to do do, do it with all your might…”

Ecclesiastes 9:10

“Put your heart and soul into every activity you do, as though you are doing it for the Lord himself and not merely for others.”

Colossians 3:23 TPT

“Yes, John, yes it is. This is a hard thing, and you need to do it, so you tell that fear to shut up!”

I think my words were spoken just to prepare him for the next moment when dad stepped in. He had gently given John several opportunities to rise above this challenge, this time, he was stern and serious, but John was ready to listen.

“John, what do you want to do? You want to quit? We aren’t quitters in this family, but here is your moment. You want to let this fear beat you, you want to quit, go ahead, start walking down the mountain.”

He challenged John to take a deep look on the inside. Beyond the feeling that kept knocking him down, beyond the roar of the “What if I fall again?”.

Beyond the fear, he had to look deep inside and decided if he was going to be in charge of his destiny or allow his fear to be in charge.  He softly whispered, “No.”

“What?” His father boldly asked?

“No, I’m not gonna quit!” He yelled back.

“Good, now get on that bike and ride down this mountain!” Dad said as he began to peddle forward.

Do you know what? That is exactly what that young man did. He got on that bike, and he began to ride down that mountain. Slow and cautious at first, but soon he was “Woo hooing” and riding with joy!

What changed?

Did the fact that he had fallen in the past change? Nope. Did the reality that he was still learning how to ride a mountain bike down a mountain change? No. What changed was his mindset.  He decided that fall or not fall, he was not a quitter, and he was not gonna give up just because he had a challenge in the past.

This brings me to another point.

~Right here, right now, this moment, the present, the current, this day~

We are so conditioned to live in the future and in the past, but what about living in the present? John was at that crossroad. He could continue to play the past over and over in his head and allow that to stop him from going any further. The mountain, however, would still be there and still need to be climbed down. He could have let the “fear of the past repeating itself in the future” stop him from moving forward, but the mountain would still be there and still need to be climbed down. We seriously could have stayed there for a very long time as the past, and the future stopped his progress in the present.

So often, this happens in life.

Progress comes to a stand still because our future fears and/or our past regrets are on continuous play in the videos of our mind. The beautiful thing is, at anytime, we have the RIGHT, the PRIVILEGE, the POWER, the AUTHORITY to press stop on that show!

 

“Brothers, I do not consider that I have made it my own. But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I pass on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.

Philippians 3:13-15

“Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalted itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ.”

II Corinthians 10:5

It takes intention to live in the present. Have you ever sat down to pray, and then a minute into your prayer, you realized you are thinking about what you are gonna cook for dinner or which shirt would go with those pants? Grabbing the mind and making it stay in the moment does take intention, but again, that power belongs to us and us alone.

I have been practicing making myself look at and live in the moment that I am in, but this has taken a lot more focus than I ever thought it would. Not looking backward, not planning too far ahead but focusing on all that is around me in the present moment is the goal, and what I have found is that there is so much to be grateful for, in love with, and overfilled with joy about..right in front of me.

We have discussed the importance of dreams and goals. Working to focus on what is right in front of my view does not negate dreams and goals. What it does, though, is help me realize which dreams and goals I have actually accomplished. It helps me define what I truly want in life because I am not looking backward to what is over and not looking too far forwards to what has not happened. I am simply flowing with the present.

When John stopped worrying about his past failure, he stopped fearing that the failure would repeat itself and began to grow his optimism and anticipation for the bike trail he was currently on.  Let’s learn from his example. Be grateful for the past in all of its lessons and blessings. Anticipate the future with all of its lessons and blessings but Live in-Thrive in-Focus-On the present moment we are in. We do not bring fears forward into our present, nor do we project them into our future. We face them by going toe to toe with them. Then let them go so we can

Enjoy the ride we are on!

Something I didn’t tell John or Jeremy until we got to the end was that shortly after John “bit the dust” the first time, my back brake fell off. Like, literally, it fell off somewhere on that mountain. Now, anyone who has ever ridden a bike knows that the back brakes help when you are going down, but the front brakes are “No Bueno” when going downhill! So here we are; we have just helped John, who has chosen to take on his fear and rock this ride, and now I’m (remember, the one who doesn’t like heights but is facing this) without a back brake.  So, I, too, had a choice to “Freeze in fear and let this challenge beat me or face the fear and move forward.” I decide to face it.  As they begin to pick up speed because their confidence has increased, I am in the back adjusting how to carefully use the front brake when needed. Needless to say, there was a moment when I squeezed that baby a bit too hard, a bit too quickly and as you may have guessed, went flying head over handlebars.  As I laid there for a second – spitting out the cedar I had in my mouth – I thought about what John had just taught me by his example. I got up, dusted myself off, spit out the cedar, and got back on that bike. I didn’t think twice about the fall; I just moved forward. When we got to the end, I patted myself on the back! Later I told the guys of my fall, and proud of me, they too gave me a “that-a-girl”!

Remember how I started with “victory produces joy and joy produces confidence”?  Well, when we got to the end of that ride, three hours after we began, that young man was glowing with joy and confidence (and so was I).  He had allowed himself to push through the hard stuff until he had a victory. With that victory, he had so much joy he was bouncing like Tigger in Winnie the Pooh.  The next day, we took our bikes on a new adventure through a two-mile trail and that “little turkey” out road both his dad and me. He was confident, stronger, and filled with joy because of the victory from the day before.

I want to close with a poem sent to me by a friend.

It was written by Ralph Waldo Emerson (one of my favorites):

“Write it on your heart
that every day is the best day in the year.
He is rich who owns the day, and no one owns the day
who allows it to be invaded with fret and anxiety.

Finish every day and be done with it.
You have done what you could.
Some blunders and absurdities, no doubt crept in.
Forget them as soon as you can, tomorrow is a new day;
begin it well and serenely, with too high a spirit
to be cumbered with your old nonsense.
This new day is too dear,
with its hopes and invitations,
to waste a moment on the yesterdays.”

“Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?”

Mathew 6:26-27

 

 

Does that face look worried? Nope!  This was taken when our task was complete.

It is the face of a young man who just overcame a challenge, had a victory, and is beaming with joy and confidence!

 Now it’s your turn!