Ask Yourself These 3

The other day I spent sometime in conversation with an acquaintance of mine.  As we talked she began telling me that if I ever need something, she was there for me.  This is a kind place to come from but as the conversation went down a winding road the words she spoke became more gossip than goodness.  I was quiet for much of it.  It wasn’t until many hours later as I thought on the it that I learned something I want to share with you.

I believe for the most part people are good.  I believe that we want to come from a good place and want to help one another.  But, in my effort to eliminate religion and build relationship, I am seeing more and more the importance of something Socrates said, James taught, and Jesus lived:

“Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?”

This statement  was from Socrates who was a Greek scholar noted for being the father of modern philosophy. This word philosophy literally means “love of wisdom”. The wisdom in these three questions is huge.

One of my favorite verses is

Psalms 19:14

“Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight oh God my strength and my redeemer.”

With this verse as a goal in my life, those three questions are a wise banner to stream across the score board of my thoughts before they become words.

Is it true?

Truth sets us free. Sometimes it can sting a bit but other times it is easy; either way, truth brings about freedom. When I speak, my words are to be honest. They are to come from an honest place.  What I saw in the conversation I am using as my example is that the words spoken started coming from a fearful place, a place that needed self validation and a place of past not present realities.  This therefore changed what was being spoken. What began as a place of “I am here for you” went to a place of “doubt, worry and fear…not freedom.

Proverbs 18:4 – The words of a man’s mouth are deep waters; the wellspring of wisdom is a flowing brook.

I am a Christian woman.  When I think of speaking to others, I want to speak words of life.  The women I was speaking with is also a Christian woman. When our conversation began it came from a place of Christ like intention, but when it went from life to gossip the Christ like part was missed.  I can have amazing intentions when I speak, the key is I need to make sure my words stay in that elevated place. I am responsible for my words, no one else is.  I can be 100% accurate and 100% wrong all in the sam breath if my “wellspring” stops coming from a place of wisdom and comes from somewhere else.

I know you have read Ephesians 4:32, “but speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in all aspects into Him who is the head, even Christ, This is what Socrates was saying…is it true? Is is kind?  Is what I am speaking is the truth from a place of love the beauty of it is, I get to grow.  I love how God always makes sure the individual choosing to live truth get to be the one to grow.

Is it kind?

1 Corinthians 13:4-7 ”

Love is large and incredibly patient. Love is gentle and consistently kind to all. It refuses to be jealous when blessing comes to someone else. Love does not brag about one’s achievements nor inflate its own importance. Love does not traffic in shame and disrespect, nor selfishly seek its own honor. Love is not easily irritated or quick to take offense. Love joyfully celebrates honesty and finds no delight in what is wrong. Love is a safe place of shelter, for it never stops believing the best for others. Love never takes failure as defeat, for it never gives up.”

This is what kind words look like. They have patience in them, they are considerate. Jealousy is not allowed to flow from behind words of kindness. In the conversation I had, the words spoken to me did not consider how I may be effected by this lady speaking of someone else’s weaknesses from the past.  This conversation did not conversation was theme in how God told her, then gossip, then God told her, then gossip…..Kind words don’t brag-inflate-shame-disrespect. Kind words are a shelter that Never stops seeing the best in others.  Once again, I am sharing this incident because it was a lesson for me. I 100% do not judge the person who spoke to me, on the contrary, I am grateful for the lesson.

We all of things we need to “look” at about ourselves.  Some may call it “fixing” yourself, some way call it “working” on yourself, I cal it “transforming” yourself! We transform by looking at these letter of life, checking ourself to see where we have conformed then focusing our attention so as to transform!

Is it necessary?

James 3:8-18

“but the tongue can no man tame; it is an unruly evil, full of deadly poison. Therewith bless we God, even the Father; and therewith curse we men, which are made after the similitude of God. Out of the same mouth proceedeth blessing and cursing. My brethren, these things ought not so to be. Doth a fountain send forth at the same place sweet water and bitter? Can the fig tree, my brethren, bear olive berries? either a vine, figs? so can no fountain both yield salt water and fresh.

Who is a wise man and endued with knowledge among you? let him shew out of a good conversation his works with meekness of wisdom. But if ye have bitter envying and strife in your hearts, glory not, and lie not against the truth. This wisdom descendeth not from above, but is earthly, sensual, devilish. For where envying and strife is, there is confusion and every evil work. But the wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, and easy to be intreated, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality, and without hypocrisy. And the fruit of righteousness is sown in peace of them that make peace.”

Let’s read this from The Passion Translation

“If you consider yourself to be wise and one who understands the ways of God, advertise it with a beautiful, fruitful life guided by wisdom’s gentleness. Never brag or boast about what you’ve done and you’ll prove that you’re truly wise. But if there is bitter jealousy or competition hiding in your heart, then don’t deny it and try to compensate for it by boasting and being phony. For that has nothing to do with God’s heavenly wisdom but can best be described as the wisdom of this world, both selfish and devilish. So wherever jealousy and selfishness are uncovered, you will also find many troubles and every kind of meanness.

But the wisdom from above is always pure, filled with peace, considerate and teachable. It is filled with love and never displays prejudice or hypocrisy in any form and it always bears the beautiful harvest of righteousness! Good seeds of wisdom’s fruit will be planted with peaceful acts by those who cherish making peace.”

James 3:14-18 TPT

It is very interesting to me that 1 Corinthians speaks of love and James speaks of how house the lounge but they both have two things in common: bragging, jealousy and hypocrisy. There must be a correlation between the heart behind my words and my words.  Food for thought.

Wisdom that is from above is pure reminds me of Psalms 50: 10 “Create in me a clean heart, O God;”

Thee points of points of th character of wisdom from above.  It is:

Jesus:

John 6:63

“The Spirit is the One who gives life. The flesh doesn’t help at all. The words that I have spoken to you are spirit and are life.”

Jesus didn’t hang out in his flesh. He spent much time alone in prayer and then when he spoke to others his words were just as James says, words from above!  the scripture says “Let this mind be in you which was also in Christ Jesus.”  it is available for our thoughts then words to be from above, spirit and life as we keep our heart set on him.  Asking ourselves these three: Is it true?-Is it kind?-Is it necessary? before we do or say anything is a practical key to help us be our best/transformed self!